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Show Notes
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Full Transcript
Hi friend,
I know that right now everything feels chaotic. It feels hard. It feels like never-ending go, go, go.
So this is an episode with five simple ways you can find the calm in the chaos. Listen and choose ONE option to take into the next week.
xo
Liz
Resources mentioned in the Show:
Emotion words for your walk:
Calm.
Joy.
Peaceful.
Clear.
Still.
Quiet.
Composed.
Collected.
Poised.
Relaxed.
Patient.
Serene.
Hey, Hey there, Liz here. And on this week's episode, we are going to be talking about. Five simple things that you can do when everything is chaos, because I know right now, a lot of people feel very overworked, very tired. Like tired to their core. And it feels like there's a lot of chaos going around. So I wanted to share five simple things.
That you can do to find that calm, even in the chaos. So to kind of come back to yourself. So let's jump right into it and learn about these five things. Well hey there, I'm Liz St. Jean and this is unruly leadership podcast where I help subject matter experts like you design a career on your terms. It's where strategy meets intuition to help you break the rules, ignore the rules and make your own damn rules. So let's break free from perfectionism, imposter thoughts, and that inner rule keeper, that's keeping you in your career comfort zone.
It's time to become unapologetically you and step into the life you were meant to live. We're going to talk presence, productivity career, and having it all. Or as my four-year-old would say - we're going to take over the world. So let's get to it.
All right. So like I mentioned in the opening, this week's episode is about the five simple things you can do when everything is chaos. And the reason I'm doing this episode is because, you know, I've been in a lot of conversations, seen a lot of conversations happening, and I know that people are feeling.
Tired like to their bones. Tired. Uh, for some people there's also an overwhelm. I don't not, not everyone is feeling overwhelmed, but some people definitely are feeling overwhelmed, like just completely drowning and everything that's going on. But what I'm also seeing are a lot of people who are. You're holding it all together. You've got everything just held together. You're balancing it all.
Kind of just perfectly and it's almost like you don't eat. I don't want to breathe out or fear that everything's going to come falling down. Just tired. There's chaos going around. You're kind of putting fires out, running from place to place, putting fires out, whether it's that you're a team leader or you're a middle manager and you're putting fires out on behalf of your team. You're trying to support your team with all the demands with your organizations, with their companies, trying to kind of come out of the pandemic and regain any losses.
There had been in the pandemic. Or if you're a subject matter expert and you're just feeling lots of pressure because maybe your organization, your company has lost a lot of talent and you're kind of still holding things together. Or maybe everyone's coming to you, maybe you're growing. Maybe you're in a company that's actually growing, coming out of the pandemic growing.
But it means you have a lot of new people, so they're coming to you as a subject matter expert. And so you're feeling overworked and trying to balance. All the work you're trying to get done. Alongside mentoring, onboarding and helping out the new people. Joining. You know, whatever it is. My sense is that you're tired.
And there's chaos and you're busy and there's work stress. And there's all these things that are going on. So what I wanted to give you were five simple things. You can do things you can really start implementing right away, but that do really have an impact on managing in that chaos on. Dare. I say, finding the calm, even, even in the chaos.
This is a common thread, a common theme for most of my clients, I'd say 90% of my clients. Um, especially folks who come into the powerful present society that's PPS, um, and then continue on to the mastermind that's available afterwards often. It's about how to show up powerfully and be calm and be connected to the people around you.
Even when there's cast swirling around you. Right. Because sometimes the chaos can be out of our control. Right. Especially, especially if you're in an, in an area where upper management is struggling. If your senior leadership is struggling, you're kind of seeing them, you're seeing them struggle as well. That struggle in a feels like it trickles.
Right. It comes down. So, you know, there's, there's a lot of things we can do for that. And I can get, we'll get into tactics and strategies. And there's other episodes about that, about what you can do, kind of tactically and strategically and to work on that within your organization.
What's really powerful is when you work on that mental fitness for yourself. So that essentially no matter what's happening, no matter how much there's fires going on, and no matter how stressed out your boss is, or your senior management is. That you can still find calm that you can still find that place of calm within yourself and show up powerfully kind of be that beacon.
we talked about this in one of our recent PPS cohort sessions a couple of weeks ago, either last week or. I think before we were talking about this, about how is sometimes there can be people on a team that really come in with an energy that pulls down the energy and it, it can, you can find yourself, even if you're the manager of a team where the project manager or team leader or subject matter expert, you can still have someone on the team that pulls down your energy. I'm sure we've all experienced that. And what we talked about, where the ways that, that instead that you can show up at a higher energy at a more positive. Powerful energy and, and, and still meet them somewhere in the middle. Kind of meet them, meet them where they're at a bit, but still pull them up to your energy rather than you being pulled down to their energy.
So I, what I wanted to give you for this week, especially cause I know how overwhelmed you are. I know how overworked do you feel? I wanted to give you simple things. So let's jump right into it. So number one, Number one is a twist on something you probably already know. So the number one is to go for a walk.
Go for a walk, get your body moving. And especially in nature, as anything you can do to get into nature into a forest where, or whether those trees or birds or water, there's a lot of research around how that impacts the brain, your brain, like how your brain finds calm in that. So I want you to do it and I'm sure you've heard this before, right?
I'm not the first person saying this. What I do want to give the twist for is that if this is actually for everyone, but especially if you're the kind of person who you kind of get in your own head, I I'm part of the, overthinkers anonymous clubs. So I'm, I'm right there with you. Anyone else who, you know, you really get in your head and you can overthink things and maybe even on a walk you're gonna spend, most of the walks were thinking or on your phone.
I'm right there with you. Uh, what I want you to do in that case. And this goes for everyone, like I said, it goes for everyone, but especially my overthinkers out there. I want you to focus on your body. I want you to focus on your emotions and on your feeling. And, um, what you're experiencing and I actually want you to be intentional about it. I don't want you to, just to kind of observe, like you can do that too. You can observe.
But what's even more powerful is to focus on how you want to feel. And just an, and this sounds so like matrix in a way, but like, feel it like the more you can. The more you focus on how you feel and just, and it's almost like you decide, like I'm going to feel that way. That feeling will come and it's going to sh and it's going to translate back up to your mind.
Um, to, to the thoughts. So focus on your body. And really identify, like, get specific. Um, more specific than I want to feel good. Or I want to feel happy. I want you to get really specific with the emotion or the state or the trait that you want to be feeling. And to help you out. I've got a few examples here. These are ones that some of my clients have used. And then I also went and I looked for other ones as well.
So what I'm going to offer you to take at least one of these. Maybe even take more. And, um, for those of you, if you're just listening, you can also hop over to the show notes and they're all, I'll put them down in the show notes down below, or over on my website. You can get them there as well. So here are some examples of how you might want to feel on the walk.
Okay. Calm.
Joy. Peaceful. Clear. Still.
Quiet. Composed. Collected. Poised. Relaxed. Patient. Or serene.
Hey. There's some options there. And if those don't resonate for you, that's totally fine too. And I'm going to give you a different resource. Actually, this is a resource I recommend, I love this resource. And it's a website called word hippo. Word HIPAA, like word. And then hippo.com. And it's essentially an online dictionary slash the Saurus slash everything else. And I use it all the time. I use it for my writing quite often, like to find.
Like you would use any dictionary with this aura to find that their words. Uh, but I actually also use it for my emotional vocabulary. So for those of you, and I'm sure it's a lot of you have been falling, you know, all the writings around emotional intelligence and vulnerability, everything by Bernie brown, all of that, we know that the better you can identify and describe your emotional state and have a stronger emotional vocabulary.
The the better control you have of your emotional state. So being able to specifically identify your emotions is so powerful. And so how I use word hippo is I'll go there and I use it one of two ways. Most often was frequently. One is if I can only think of the more common word. You know, like happy even, even joy.
I love the word joy and joyful, by the way, I love that word. But I use it a lot, so at least in my own head. So I would go there and find a synonym for one of those words. Hey, that's a little more of an obvious one. The other thing though you can do. And actually did that. Did both of these, for this exercise to come up with words for you.
Is take the word that you are currently feeling the. The, um, the uncomfortable negative state, sometimes they say uncomfortable or the quote negative. Emotional state you're having. So like, in this case, chaos was the word and you look up the antonyms and see what comes up for the antonyms for something like chaos or whatever it is that you're feeling.
If you're feeling frustrated, stressed. Um, overworked, right? Overwhelmed. Any of those words go and look up the antonym and then you might not hear it. So this is parked at a little bonus tip. You might not get the word you're looking for right away. But then, so let's say we start with chaos, go look up a word of an antonym and take one that's close, but maybe it doesn't quite hit it.
And then look up the synonym for that word. Okay. So there's two plus a bonus tip on exp on how to expand your emotional vocabulary. Um, easily and quickly, because if you're anything like me, like, I, I don't know. I didn't learn about any of this stuff, any of this emotional intelligence stuff until.
Oh, gosh, I don't even know how many years I was into my career. So I did not have a very strong emotional vocabulary. So this has been very important for me in my learning. And I, I just, I really recommend it. And word hippo can be your best friend. I promise.
Okay. So that's your number one simple thing, but with a little twist, Number two. Number two is when you are feeling chaos. Especially, especially at work, but it can be at home too, but especially in the workplace, it was chaos. Overworked. Maybe overwhelmed, all the things going on. I want you to identify your goal.
Identify her goal. What are you working towards specifically? Not what are you doing? Because I find way too often professionals get caught up in what needs to be done, what we're doing, what needs to be done. As opposed to what we're trying to accomplish. So what's your goal? Six months from now, six months has kind of a good timeline for this.
And what will you have accomplished in six months? How will you know that? What you're doing today is successful six months from now. Now, depending on your industry, three months might make more sense maybe even 12 months, but six months, six to 12 months is usually a nice timeline because it's kind of far enough out that you're not feeling that.
Um, Tightness of a bit of an anxiousness coming in the tightness of feeling that, oh my goodness, how are we getting this done in time? You're giving yourself time, but you're not putting it too far out. Right? This is not like a three five-year goal that you're kind of slowly hunting towards. You want it close enough in time that you can, you can still see it, but far enough away that you're not feeling tight and anxious about it.
But I really want you to focus on what, what is this outcome? What is the accomplishment going to be? What's the impact that you're trying to have? And really come back to that every time that you start to notice that you feel you're feeling either flustered, your inbox is going crazy and you got too many to-do lists and that.
I would actually even recommend like stepping away from her desk either, either closing your laptop, but step away from your desk, remind yourself, what are you trying to accomplish? And then ask yourself, what's the most important thing I can do towards that goal? Hey, what's the most important thing.
Because if you're feeling overwhelmed over work, like if you. I feel like you're having to work extra hours and you're scrambling to keep up with things. Chances are, you're not going to do everything anyways. So what you want to do is you really need to narrow in on what your priorities are and your priorities need to be tied to an outcome.
Right. What's the outcome going to be? Okay. So I really want you to do that, identify your goal and make sure what you're doing passes. That kind is kind of like a litmus test. Like, how is this thing that I'm, you know, is this email is answering this email going to help me towards my goal? Yes or no. And really trying to mitigate yes or no as best you can.
And if everything's a yes, well, maybe we'll do another podcast about that, about prioritizing so we can we'll come back to that another time. Okay. So that's number two. Number three. I want you to find someone and talk to someone. Here's the key part. Who will hold space for you? Hold space for you. That's a very coachy terms. A lot of you might not have heard this term before. I'm feeling very woo by itself, even as I use it. Oh my goodness. I'm kind of shaking my head at myself, but it is really important. The idea of holding space. So as a coach, what we did go through with our training is that holding space, I could do it professionally, but I'm sure you have someone in your life.
Like either someone, you know, or perhaps your organization, you have trained professionals. Either in your company often, conflict management professionals are often good to go to. Maybe you have access to better up like one-off coaching sessions through better up through your, maybe through your EAP,
and. What I, what, I mean, I should've said this earlier. What I mean by holding space is that they give you space that's nonjudgmental. They ask you questions. They don't turn the spotlight back on themselves. They're not competing. Right. We've all had that. We all have that friend who you, that does the one-upping and I'm sure we all do it.
Come on. A hundred percent. We've all done it too. Like we can't just judge others. But find that person who you know, is really good at doing that at holding that space for you, letting you express yourself and letting, letting you get it out, like having a BFF and. Um, I know a lot of times we do we'll either text or send a message to someone, but I really encourage you to find some time, even if it's just 10 minutes, 10 minutes or 15 minutes to actually express it verbally, getting it out.
Expressing it ha having, even that space, that conversation with someone who's really listening, who really cares and will give you the time and gave you essentially the spotlight, but give you that space to express and then that way you can get it out, give it a place to breathe and get and get out of again. And out of yourself.
You know, this is actually one of the, one of the best parts about PPS, powerful presence society. Is that we have that space. That when we have a cohort go together, they're giving each other space and I'm right there with them, guiding them to create a safe space to talk.
And it really is a place where we can share and we can learn from each other and we really get it out. And this is something that I hear over and over and over again from the participants who are in there from the mentors that they just love to have the space to share, to learn from one another. And so I really encourage you to find that as well, to find a place where you can get that.
And if this is something you're interested in. Definitely com sign up for the PPS waitlist. We will do another cohort. Um, next January, there'll be another cohort running. So make sure you get signed up for that wait list. And join us on the next round.
Then number four is a, perhaps is an obvious one as well, but I did want to share because it is so important and that is to make sure you have mindful moments in your day. Mindful moments. And I really do mean moments like this. Doesn't have to be a. Like a 20 minute yoga session with, you know, deep meditation. Like if you can do that as well, like that's amazing.
But it can also be moments. So I'll give you my example. This is why I included in here. Cause often think about this just to share like my own example is that, um, I have this exfoliant that I use and so I use, I have it. Um, in the shower and I use it and I mean, it's not for very long, but I, when I use it, like, all I'm doing is concentrating on that exfoliant on my skin.
I'm just sort of just being in that moment. I'm just being, and I'm just focused very closely on that, that feeling of. He can't see me obviously, but I'm kind of got my hand up close to my face and rubbing it as. As though I have it. But I'm just focusing that feeling on. Oh, my cheeks and my cheeks, especially I find, uh, I don't know the research here, why doesn't my cheeks, but like the cheeks and on my skin and just feeling it, that bit of that, um, that grit on my skin. And it just takes me away from everything else. And just gives me that mindful moment of being in that experience.
It's kind of similar to the first one about feeling your body getting used to feeling your body. Hey, so what's your mindful moment. What's, what's a moment you can have, you know, maybe it's at the same time as going for that watch is really getting present, being very mindful of that walk. Um, another example I'd heard once was.
W for your, um, for your children and like taking a moment, just like, just really looking at your child or at a loved one or at a picture, just like just looking at it and appreciating it and loving it. But just being in that moment. And just focusing and being mindful for that moment.
The last number for mindful moments. Now number five. Is again, you might have heard this one before, so maybe I'm just reinforcing something you've heard, but especially if you haven't heard this one before. This one is so, so critical. Which is two. Breathe.
And pause. Right. And, and find that calm inside, figure out where it sits inside of you. It might sit in different places for people. Um, for me, I can feel it kind of really in my center. That's where I feel it. And, uh, Just really get into that breath. Deep breaths, opening up your body, get the oxygen circulating around.
That calms the body. There's a, this is, this, this whole episode really is about that, like mind, body connection a bit. Right. But it really calms your body. Take a pause, take a moment. 'cause we go, go, go, go, go so much that it's just absolutely imperative to be able to pause. To breathe to find the calm.
And. I really encourage you for anyone who, um, hasn't sort of, I would say even like figured out where calm is, this is such a phenomenal exercise to, to learn yourself, to learn what your calm feels like. Very similar to that walk. When I was talking about earlier about. About the finding that emotion.
I think I even got, I said calm earlier as an, as a state, as that feeling to have. But this is so powerful because when you, when you know what it feels like, You can slip into it. So much more quickly, you can find that place quickly. And this is where that even, even in the chaos, even what everything happening around you, you can find that calm.
You can find that place. You can feel it. Okay. So often we try to work on the mind first, right. And there's a really common way. And that's another, um, there's a mental fitness there as well about changing your thoughts and have, and control. And, um, I like having control. I think mine control over yourself. Innocence.
And then it's really powerful. And what I'm offering here is, is. That is a suggestion that starting with your body sometimes is also powerful or sometimes even more powerful. Um, yeah, maybe working on your thoughts first can be powerful sometimes, but sometimes working on your body first can be so powerful. And I mentioned that earlier. It's almost like you can just decide.
To be calm, just like I'm going to be calm now. And if he know what that feels like, you can find it. You know, I think about. Um, it's been many years, but I used to play different types of competitive sports. And, um, I did. Skiing. I did different, different kinds of sports and. Um, One of the things is as when you practice it and got into it.
If you just, you could just slide into it. Like you could just step into that, whatever. Um, position or holding your body in a certain way and you just, your body just knew it, it was very comfortable in that position and it is the same way with finding calm or any of those other. Uh, examples that I had earlier finding peace, finding poise, feeling serene or patient.
If I need any of those. And you practice it. You can slide into it so much more easily. And breathing is part of all of them.
Breathing, you will notice. I get for those of you, hopefully some of you are doing that with me right now. She do that with me right now. Take a breath.
And for a lot of you, what you'll notice you probably just notice this is that you, you release some tension in your shoulders. Your body opened up. A bit, maybe a lot, but at least a little bit. Right. You're opening. You're feeling more open. Right. And you're going to feel more powerful. So like I mentioned, this is something that we do in, in, um, PPS, in powerful presence society. Is that, how do we feel more powerful? How do we feel that.
Openness openness to new ideas showing up more powerfully. It's a really important, so all of these pieces are important. A number one, go for a walk and practice, feeling, practice, intentionally, feeling a feeling that's going to help you. They have that calm in the chaos. Number two, identify your goal and make sure what you're doing is working towards that goal. You're not just doing things for doing sake.
What is the goal you're working towards? Hey, number three. Findings. Uh, someone who you can talk to hold space for you, right? Even if it's not, it doesn't necessarily have to be some professional. If you have access to someone professional, that's wonderful, but it doesn't have to necessarily be someone. It can be a friend. It can be a work colleague, but you want someone who's going to be non-judgemental is going to listen.
Let you have that space. We're for mindful moments. Find your mindful moment. Something that you can do. Um, I don't think I mentioned this earlier, but something you really can do on a daily basis or every couple of days, but if you can get into a habit of a daily basis, a mindful moment. Again, it doesn't have to be long.
But just that regular practice of mindful moments. And then number five, let's do it again together.
Bri. Pause. Feel what it feels like for you to find that calm. Hey. I want you to take at least one of those, if not all five, like these are fairly simple, so they, you can build them in. But I also know it's a lot to change your habits. Like that's a whole other piece. We can talk about habit change and building these habits.
But at least pick one. Pink one and commit to me, commit to yourself for, for the next week. Do that one. So it's either go for a walk intentional intentionally with your, with your feelings. Uh, identify your goal. Talk to someone. Find your mindful moments or breathe. I want you to pick one of those five for this next week and, and let me know how it goes. Reach out to me. However, you know how to find me. You can check the show notes. There's lots of ways to come find me, send me a DM on LinkedIn. You can find me, um, in the Facebook group, you can send me an email.
However you want to find me, let me know how it goes. Let me know which one you chose of those five, which one really resonated for you or even which one are you already doing? And maybe you can add one more to your toolkit. Okay. So with that, have yourself a wonderful week. And I'll be back at you next week.
Bye. Bye.
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Thanks again. And now get out there and start breaking some rules.
